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1995-08-20
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Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative
Path: newserv.ksu.ksu.edu!moe.ksu.ksu.edu!vixen.cso.uiuc.edu!howland.reston.ans.net!usc!elroy.jpl.nasa.gov!lll-winken.llnl.gov!fnnews.fnal.gov!att-in!cbnewsm!vsuhocki
From: vsuhocki@cbnewsm.cb.att.com (v.p.suhocki)
Subject: Re: Frengi (sp?) Laws for business
Organization: AT&T
Date: Tue, 24 May 1994 02:11:20 GMT
Message-ID: <CqABF0.8pp@cbnewsm.cb.att.com>
References: <2rpfmm$t1p@usenet.INS.CWRU.Edu>
Lines: 103
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- =-=-=-=
THE RULE$ OF ACQUI$ITION - FERENGI
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- =-=-=-=
[You can distribute this list as you wish, as long as you don't modify it!]
Compiled by.......: Martin Goulet (gouletm@JSP.UMontreal.CA)
Last updated......: May 23, 1994
New rules.........: 285 (The collaborator)
1. Once you have their money, you never give it back.
[Rom, "The Nagus"]
3. Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
[Quark, "The Maquis Part II"]
6. Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
[Zek, "The Nagus"]
7. Keep your ears open.
[Odo, "Hands of the prophet"]
9. Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
[Nog, "The Storyteller"]
16. A deal is a deal.
[Quark, "Melora"]
21. Never place friendship above profit.
[Quark, "Rules of acquisition"]
22. A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
[Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
31. Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother.
[Quark, "The siege"]
33. It never hurts to suck up to the boss.
[Quark & Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
47. Never trust anyone whose suit is nicer than your own.
[Quark, "Rivals"]
48. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.
[Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
57. Good customers are as rare as latinum, treasure them.
[Quark, "Armageddon game"]
59. Free advice is seldom cheap.
[Quark, "Rules of acquisition"]
62. The riskier the road, the greater the profit.
[Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
76. Every once in a while declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your
enemies.
[Quark, "The homecoming"]
103. Sleep can interfere .... [cut off]
[Pel, "Rules of acquisition"]
109. Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.
[Quark, "Rivals"]
112. Never have sex with the boss' sister.
[Quark, "Playing God"]
139. Wives serve, brothers inherit.
[Odo, "Necessary evil"]
194. It's always good business to know about new customers before they
walk in your door. [Quark wasn't sure of the number of this one]
[Quark, "Whispers"]
214. Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach.
[Quark, "The Maquis Part I"]
285. No good deed ever goes unpunished.
[Quark, "The collaborator"]
=-=-=-=-=
NOTES
=-=-=-=-=
* In the TNG episode "Bloodlines", cmdr. Riker mentions that the
Ferengi governement is debating an amendment to the Rules of Acquisition.
(stardate 47829.1)
* We know from Quark (The Maquis Part I) and from Pel (Rules of acquisition)
that there are 285 rules of acquisition.
* Quark mentionned rule #223 in "Profit and Loss".
* Pel may have invented what she said from the rule #103
--
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